what will i do.

I know i said i was going to write about Tivi or To Tivi, and i suppose in a way it all is to her, to Them. A documentation of who we were, probably more so- who i am. I was once accused by an anonymous person, of seeing the world wrong, of making myself the center of the universe. I remember this only because i thought about it, and decided- but that is logically the only way i can see things. I am no one else but me, and I am therefore the center of my universe.


Selfishness only comes into the equation if i put my interests before and at the expense of someone else. I don't think writing does that. I think what i think and i never mean malice by it.

Anyway this will be another random thoughts post- coz i have many random thoughts one of which is -  during my pregnancies, i never liked to watch the news, i couldn't take the world in all its misery - i remember one night heavily pregnant with Che ( i think it was the day before he was born), turning on the TV to the story of a man throwing his daughter off a bridge in Melbourne. I sat there in disbelief, tears rolling down my face, terrified for all the children of the world. Seriously to this day, i can't think of that story without feeling the exact same way.

You always hear about the bad news, the sad news, the shocking, appalling, crumbling state of things... rarely do you hear about things like this https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=1378237514624 and i'm sure all around the world, in small and quiet places. These extraordinary things occur all the time.

There are People who see suffering and pain and loneliness, and instead of averting their eyes to the next distraction, of thinking what can they do- of walking away... stop and actually change things. One situation at a time, one person at a time.

It's all too easy to turn away and go on with our lives - the same way people tell me, i don't like giving to that charity because half of it goes to admin fees- well as long as the other half is helping someone, that's okay with me. The administration fee helps to keep someone in a job, a job that helps someone else. Win both ways right?

But I'm guilty all the time of apathy, of turning off the images and going shopping to buy more things we don't need. I'm guilty of thinking, what could i possibly do that would change anything right now.

And it makes me extremely happy to see a video like that, because i know that it is possible. To stop and say no, today i won't just walk away from it, i can do something. Maybe not change the world, maybe not change everything - but this.... right here, right now... I can do something about this.

I want you kids, to live extraordinary lives, to know that you are capable of anything you want to do, more importantly that change is possible, in an instant, in a single thought - change you, change someones day, change this moment, change the world...

Don't feel bad about the things you haven't done, didn't do, can't do... but look for the things you can do - and do them. Do them because you can do something - even if it is small... a billion small kindnesses, add up and it all counts.

ANyway its 2.30 am and my mind is blank with Tired. There are parties n such to attend this weekend so i'll let you go here.

Grateful today for friends who are honest, for kids who are true and for hope, that shimmers, shines and radiates.